backstabbing- infighting- jealousy- forgotten stars...just another week in Hollywood.

backstabbing- infighting- jealousy- forgotten stars...just another week in Hollywood!

Friday, December 19, 2014

Chris Rock Terrified of Email Hacking

Even Benedict Cumberbatch is worried!

Kim Jung Il knows how to get attention. When Sony did some kind of "assassination by effigy" movie featuring James Franco and Seth Rogan as journalists commissioned by the CIA to kill the North Korean leader, the shit hit. Not that Kim Jung Il went Jihad or anything. He went more Ashton Kutcher PUNKed. That is he got his special band of superfriends called the Guardians of Freedom to use their cyber powers and crack SONY wide open, on an "e" basis that is.

It was awful. Embarrassing celebrity aliases like Niel Depp, and Shady McFaye , got released tot he public. We found out that Angelina Jolie is a bitch, even though she hadn't done anything particularly bitch besides insisting on her choice of director for her new Cleopatra flick - which incidentally sounds like a debacle in the making. Worse than Annie! That's a problem because some Hollywood producers - Amy Pascal & Scott Rudin, wanted the same director for their Steve Jobs pic which sounds like and even bigger waste of time and money! So we found out that hi powered execs are as crude and vulgar as we suspected - but can making a silky smooth apology when the occasion calls for it - "Sorry about the foot in my mouth but it's a twitch!". So the only one better off after this is Steven Colbert!

Everyone else is cringing in terror: action heroes, sex sirens, Bart Simpson, you name it! The whole industry is embarrassed and quite frankly one upped! SONY has pulled it's film. Sony Studio exces deny rumours that they have a new flick in the works called "Glorious Leader" and based on Kim's rise to power (Ang Lee's directing!). They swear they're really working on an adaption of the old coyote roadrunner cartoons featuring Angelina Jolie, and with possibly Liam Neeson as the coyote. Jack Nicholson was their first choice, but Jack's getttin' old. Johnny Depp was 2nd, but you know - the Tourist. Depp's never forgiven Angelina for that and is not about to work with her again.

It's not gonna be lame or anything either. They don't dress Angelina up like a cartoon character. The characters are human, cross country, out law road racers. Jolie wears a 'road runner' tattoo, and occasionally says "beep,beep". When she crosses paths with Neeson's Coyote character they engage in a sexually charged cross country race. It's like Smokey & the Bandit, but without all the homosexual subtext!

So it's good to know that Hollywood is bouncing back and getting right back down to business as usual!


Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Hollywood vs The Guardians of Peace

You've probably herd about the Sony hack. That's where North Korea allegedly got even for an unwelcome Kim Jung-il portrayal in an upcoming Sony movie. So instead of behaving like insane antisocial terrorists and blowing stuff up, Kim Jung showed some finesse and gamesmanship by turning the whole situation around, and into an embarrassing mess for Sony.

He did that by allegedly using a all star hacker squad called the Guardians of Peace (unless the Guardians of Peace are that super villain group who are holding Wonder Woman bound and gagged in the basement of a used comic store - who would think to look there?). Those snaky rogues are the ones that allegedly got into Sony's database, or something, and then exposed all their hypersensitive info, like employee SINs, tax info (and that shit ain't begun to hit the fan yet), and most notably so far - embarrassing emails!

The emails have really gotten folks attention. Many are between studio head Amy Pascal and producer Scott Rudin. He's the one who doesn't like Angelina Jolie. That came out during e mail discussions over that new Steve Jobs flick that doesn't look like it's gonna ever get made. For one thing the deal keeps coming apart. Rudin & Pascal can't get the crew they want to work with because and for one thing people like Big Angie keep stealing their thunder! So names get called.

Rudin & Pascal also pass the time of day, in between Hollywood temper tantrums, by making mildly racist comments about the president, and speculating on the size of Michael Fassbender's great big dick. Fassbender if the actor slated for the role of Steve Jobs - because no one else, like Christian Bale or Leo DiCaprio, wants to touch it. Anyway the supreme head of SONY has just called some kind of emergency town hall and reassured listeners that "this isn't gonna take us down".

Keep up on your Sony hack reader:

Sony's Amy Pascal alleges Aaron Sorkin is 'sleeping with Molly Bloom' in leaked emails | Daily Mail Online

Sony emails reveal Jennifer Lawrence paid less than male co-stars | Film | The Guardian

Sony shuts down filming in the wake of hacking attack that has ruined its financial software as well as leaking thousands of embarrassing emails | Daily Mail Online

BTW here is a little pic of Pascal with Jolie at some awkward Hollywood function - note the tension.

Angelina Jolie and Amy PAscal - of the Sony hack emails, have an awkward Hollywood confrontation


Saturday, November 29, 2014

Has Wonder Woman Found the Right Director?

& now a BBC movie on Stephen Hawking

Now all that egg head stuff is fine and good, but how much science is really science fiction? Take the Van Allen Belt for instance. Now that ain't the thing Lynda Carter used to wear on Wonder Woman, to get her Amazon super powers. It's a protective radiation shield that surrounds the earth. Problem is that you can't get through it without getting fried. That's what NASA engineer Kelly Smith explains at approx 3 mins in to the following video on the Orion spacecraft. So did he unintentionally admit that we have never been anywhere near the moon (the whole landing was probably faked in the arid New Mexico environment down around Area 51). View the following and decide for yourselves!


Friday, November 28, 2014

Megan Fox Sudoku Accident!

Megan Fox develops new crease!

Megan Fox has been keeping herself busy lately and not just with Ninja Turtles. She's the wife of actor/song writer Brian Austin Green, and the proud mother of two. So what with the excess of children and actors in her life Megan has been desperate for some adult activities. So she recently tried picking up on the Sudoku craze.

Sudoku - which is almost as well known as Megan Fox - is the Japanese puzzle in which no.'s 1 from 9 have to be placed in a 9 segmented 81 squared grid, without repetitions. It's a brain teaser. So megan thought it would be a perfect new pass time.

According to the usual unnamed sources (yes we have spies!), Megan was out in a cafe for some me time when she was spotted trying her hand at the popular Japanese puzzle. Witnesses say she gave it a serious effort too. Wheels could be seen, visibly, turning. Soon smoke was spotted coming from her ears.  Eventually a loud pop was heard coming from somewhere within Megan's lovely head. Then it happened. Megan's valuable face became distorted into what appears to be a permanent expression of thought! I can't say that it has the same effect as when celebs where clear lens spectacles on talk shows, but the effect is a little shocking. Let's have a look -

Megan Fox develops a thought dent after a prolonged sudoku struggle
Megan Fox develops a thought dent after a prolonged sudoku struggle

Remember when your mother told you that "Your face will stay that way if the wind changes"?

It's as bad as that time Scarlett Johansson went temporarily crossed eyed while doing that cross word puzzle! As you can see poor Megan concentrated so hard that she created a "dent", or permanent concentration furrow deep in the center of her forehead. It kind of looks like an upside down "U". Now the dent isn't serious, except maybe to Megan's career (however I've heard that her new crease has attracted the attention of Sin City director Robert Rodriguez, who now wants to sign her on for a SC sequel possibly as Mickey Rourke/Marve's sister.). There have been some rumours about strange auras projecting from Megan's new crease, and even some near by electro magnetic, psychokinetic disturbances. So if it get's announced that Megger's third eye had opened, or that she's developed super powers and is using them to land a part in some upcoming comic based film, then remember that you heard it here 1st!


Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Jennifer Aniston Breaks Down in Cake Trailer

courtesy of WochitEntertainment

Jennifer Aniston's Cake performance is getting lots of Oscar buzz, and after watching the full-length trailer, it's easy to see why! Jen plays Claire Simmons, a woman addicted to prescription painkillers after an injury leaves her in chronic pain. When Nina, a member of her support group played by Anna Kendrick, commits suicide, Claire becomes obsessed with piecing together the broken fragments of her past life—all while breaking down in her own relentless quest for drugs.


Tuesday, November 25, 2014

Top 10 Smartest People In the World 2014

The world is full of famous people. Many of them don't even have super powers either! They are famous for a variety of reasons like being outrageously good looking, being able to deliver 2 and a half lines of dialogue with a semblance of sincerity, having more money than any human being has any business having, or getting elected to some position where they have to look competent if not actually busy.That's not even mentioning the people who get too much plastic surgery or get themselves implanted with multiple artificially inseminated embryos. These are some of the many paths to fame. Or you could just try walking around with your underwear on top of your clothes and shitty side out!

Then there are those folks who get some level of fame for being "smart". You might have even heard their names once or twice - "Wasn't he on Jeopardy?". They're usually people who've passed some test and may or may not have a first class education in a technical field; something like teaching nanobots to manipulate widgets and an atomic level. That's the kind of stuff that may have no real world applications but can really clean up in research grants!

Anyway here now are a list of some of the smartest people you've never heard of. Fame, it can happen to anyone!

Coming soon -Did Jennifer Aniston break down in a cake trailer? The answer to that may surprise you, so check out tomorrow's post and find out!


Saturday, November 22, 2014

Full Cosby Exchange With AP on Allegations

AS you may or may not be ware comedian Bill Cosby as become the object of some disturbing allegations. So far as many as 13 women have claimed the Cos had non consensual sex with them; by drugging them and taking advantage of them when they were unable to consent. These allegations have been circulating around for years. However they never fully came to the light of day. That may partly be due to the fact  that Cosby has payed off many of the alleged victims. It may also be due to the fact that The Cos don't add fuel to the fire by discussing the matter publicly. Especially not with journalists. Here is one of the few occasions when the subject came up, and this time with Associated Press!

BTW The World's Most Dangerous Supermodel, Janice Dickinson, is also claiming that Cosby had unlawful sexual relations with her. She was auditioning for a part on the Cosby Show at the time. SO the Cos invites her down to Lake Tahoe for drinks and negotiations. Janice goes on to say that the Cos offered her red wine and a pill. When she awoke - according to Dickinson - she was in a state of undress and had signs of sexual assault "semen between the legs".

Dickinson claims that when she later penned her autobiography - No Lifeguard On Duty, she had included the incident but Cosby's lawyers pressured her publishers to drop the incident. While some question Dickinson's veracity - suspecting that perhaps she 'exaggerated' for publicity, Howard Stern has recently aired a 2006 interview with Ms Dickinson in which she described the Cos as some kind of creep - "not a nice man, and preys on women". So that was well before the brouhaha hit the fan.

Oh yeah - former TV daughter Lisa Bonet has also added her own cryptic tweet.




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