Remember when Octomom got big a few years back (both literally and figuratively)? Apart from the fact that she'd had 8 kids at once, the thing that amazed people was her resemblance to Angelina Jolie. Then it turned out that the resemblance, like the pregnancy wasn't on the level. She'd got her self knocked up with multiple embryos using a doctor who's license got pulled after the scam got uncovered. The doctor who gave her the Jolie face transplant is apparently still working and perfecting his/her technique. Or so the sudden emergence of Angelina Jolie clones would have you think.
The big one at the moment is Lina Sands. She's an aspiring Spanish actress - aspiring actress that is since I think being Spanish comes naturally. She won't confirm or deny having any little cosmetic touch ups, but she doesn't mind flaunting her resemblances to yesterdays sex symbol by way of youtube (it would've lsot impact on Twitter so Youtube was the way to go with this). Here's the video that's starting ot make some buzz!
Girls Moist Likely!
She does look like Vagina Jolie - as she did about 12 years and 30 pounds ago. People liked her better then. Also this chick seems to have a pleasant and suer friendly personality. That's unlike Jolie who always seemed a little possessed. People found that exciting but were never quite sure when the actress might go off her head, run amok, or possibly even get dangerous. Now that only goes to show that you can't judge a book by it's public image since apart from holding Brad Pitt hostage these many years, Jolie never ever did go on that long anticipated Thelma and Louise cross country crime spree. Others like Lindsay Lohan, Mischa Barton, and Britney Spears were gonna have to fill the mayhem void that Jolie had been pegged to plug. Which only goes to show that sometimes it's the ones you least suspect instead of the girl most likely.
So there's Lina out there sporting an over bite like Bugs Bunny while pro gossip writers go "WOW - another one". Thing is that she ain't the only one. There seem to be a whole slew of unsung Vagina Jolie duplicates out there. Like the chick from the Ukraine for one thing. Her name is Tatyana Vorzheva and might look more like Pia Zadora at first - until you know what you're looking for (how else can you see what you're supposed to see?).
Plastic surgery is an assembly line for D Listers!
The girl seems to have something - but there is too mush Pia Zadora mixed in to be convincing. That's why it's good to have the professionals to fall back on. By professionals I mean the army of impersonators who make their dubious living as celebrity body doubles and both dine and out pay the rent by their resemblance, chance or surgical, to the famous. Jolie isn't an exception there. She also has a professional impersonator, apart from Octomom. This one goes under the moniker of Tiffany Claus and here's a look at her.
She is convincing but may have had help from the scalpel. Now those who aspire to Joliehood should be warned that getting sliced and diced to fame and fortune is not without it's side effects. "Not without" is an awkward way of say "it has". Here it is!
So where does this leave us? A little better off maybe. Vagina Jolie was getting a terrible attitude that comes from being one of a kind. The minute some one figures out that others think they're dispensable then they're on the short road to turning into Hitler! Fortunate Vagina kept it in check and limited it to writing for the economist and stealing kids from the 3rd world - Baba Yaga style (Baba Yaga is an eastern European term for the local witch who likes to steal children from new mothers. The name literally means "Boney Ass" and at Jolie's current weight it fits!).
you can't spell "superficial" without "super"
The thing is now we have some substitutes to fall back on, in case the whole beauty thing starts really going to Vagina's head. Should Hollywood's No 1 fembot malfunction and go haywire - say by running for Pres in the fall with Sarah Palin as VP, or even by getting a show on the OWN Network, then she cane be shelved indefinitely while one of the younger friendlier 2.0 versions are made much of. That'll teach her. It might diminish the whole cachet of uniqueness though, when clones start popping up with the frequency of new born bunnies. Still this is the age of the iPhone - every one has one and there's always a better one. So think of this as making beauty more democratic!
Now here's another little cautionary video on the perils of plastic surgery - Megan Fox style!
In a more naive time they would've billed those before shots as "Megan without make up!" Now the 1st video morns the loss of a 'great beauty'. It should be pointed out that Megan is still alive, though she looks a little different. Maybe that's the repsonse that fuels the insecureities that lead to the plastic surgery in the first place. The point is that no one stopped her, not even for the good of the nation! We were more concerned with Lindsay Lohan. That's a shame since you can always go to rehab for drug addiction but there's no eraser for plastic surgery! So hopefully the beautiful people and their marketers will keep that in perspective from here on in - It is Hollywood so let's not let mental health concerns ever get a head of looking your very best! AS for Foxy, if she was gonna get renovations done on her face, couldn't she have gotten something done about those awful thumbs at the same time!
You can't spell superficial without super!
